Respecting Your Way To Success.

The concept of Respect in this context has to do with the foundation of the Human Operating System. When the client / customer experiences respect at the Operating System level, they have an unconscious response which manages their conscious feelings and reaction to you and your services. If you want to begin a relationship, it would be important to start with trust and rapport. Trust and Rapport are the result of Respectful Unconscious Systems Alignment.

MOTIVATIONAL SOURCE. 

This category determines whether a person provides their own motivation or has it provided from sources outside themselves.  This category also evaluates whether a person is self-directed or needs direction and feedback from others and whether the person relies on internal judgments or on the judgments of others.

The two basic patterns of behavior for this category are INTERNAL and EXTERNAL.  The INTERNAL person is self-directed and makes their own judgments based on their own criteria.  The EXTERNAL person needs direction from others and accepts the judgments of others.

PATTERN IDENTIFICATION

Internal:

Indicates that they decide for themselves through their own criteria

Uses such phrases as:

I decide

I (you) just know

I feel good about it

When I've done my very best

When I've met my own criteria

External:

Sense of relying on others to determine the quality of their own work, using the other person's criteria to do so.

Treats incoming external information as the decision itself.

Uses such phrases as:

My boss tells me.

By the (company) evaluation

My customers let me know

I get compliments on my work

EXAMPLES:

Internal

I can just tell when I've done a good job because I feel good about it.

When I've done the best I can, I know I've done a good job.

External

I get a good evaluation and my boss tells me I've done a good job.

My customers let me know if I have done what they expect.

INTERPRETATION

An INTERNAL person relies on their own judgments, evaluations, and opinions.  This person decides what is to be done and how the task or project is to be carried out.  This person also evaluates their own job performance by internal criteria and does not accept the evaluation of others.  They tend to discount the opinions and directions of other people.  They set their own direction and are motivated when they make the decisions.  They may listen to opinions and directions from an outside source, but they take this as information, which they will then evaluate according to their own standards.  This person needs to be in work situations which require self-direction and in which they may make their own decisions.  To work toward company goals or objectives, this person must agree to accept those as their own.

The EXTERNAL person needs others to decide for them.  They rely on the judgments, evaluations, and opinions of others.  They conform to other people’s beliefs and require feedback from others to know the quality of their own work.  They take direction from others and need that direction to know what to do and how to do it.  This person is motivated when decisions are made for them.  They do well in work situations in which there is on-going direction and evaluation.

INFLUENCING LANGUAGE

The words and phases you use the influence.

INTERNAL

• Only you can decide.
• You know within yourself.
• You decide.
• It’s up to you.
• Self-directed  (you ask for their ideas and agreement)

EXTERNAL

• You will get feedback.
• Others will let you know.
• On-going direction.
• Recognition  (you tell them)

Using respectful persuasive language

When speaking or writing to an individual who demonstrates an INTERNAL pattern it is important to phrase your conversation around them making the decision. EX. “ After you make the determination you may want to begin using our product in the field.”

When communicating with a person who has demonstrated an EXTERNAL pattern you must create direction for them. EX. “We suggest that you begin to use our product in the field and notice just how much more effective your systems will respond.

When you use words in your communication that respect your client/customer’s unconscious motivational patterns you may find that the communication becomes easier and more persuasive.  When you give your client/customers what they want the way they want it, which supports their internal operating system, you stand out as someone who differentiates themself from the competition.

For further information or assistance please feel free to contact me.

Marvin C Sadovsky, PhD

505.982.4361

Director