Home. Home. Home.
These were the last words my mother wrote before she died.
Not once, but thrice. I love that.
I have kept this wildy colorful journal of hers and used it as a prop in the first play we ever did at the Playhouse. My mother always said that she liked to live in a house that looked lived in. To me, this translated as disarray. It’s not that our house was messy or cluttered, but she lived for the moment and we would often run out the door to a movie or a baseball game without picking things up. I remember once, after a large L.A earthquake running out the door to catch a plane to Mexico with her to celebrate her 50th birthday. She said, don’t worry about all this stuff, it will be here when we get back. She was right. It was.
January gifted me with the opportunity to return home, to my old home of Los Angeles. I spent time hiking with a friend up to the Observatory, a place I went to on field trips as a kid. I roamed through my old Catholic elementary school with three of my dearest friends who have known me since I was 8 years old. I stood in front of the Church where my mother's funeral was held. And yet, familiar as it was, home has since shifted for me.
I also travelled home inwardly to parts of myself that I hadn’t revisited in awhile. I spoke of grief and abandonment with the same three friends. I talked of dreams and hopes to come. I allowed myself to travel outwardly in my body and in my mind. I spent four days traipsing around NY, walking for miles, sleeping little, talking lots, and taking in the big apple and loving on my friends. Home is in New York, and it is also in Los Angeles, and now it is in Portland, and it once was in Australia.
My life is full of movement, both inner and outer. It’s what I love about life, and hate. That things change. Sometimes I want them to, other times I’m scared for them to change. Running and yoga have kept me fluid. Watching the sunrise daily has reminded me of this fluidity and brevity of life. I’m both in awe of it and aware that time is short.
Home is in the gaze of a loving partner or a friend that knows me without words coming between us. Home is in my dogs, Frida and Lucca’s eyes. Home is listening to my father in law share everything he knows about golf while I lay beside him. Home is in my first sip of coffee pre-dawn. Home is in my heart that is pressing out a new idea. Home is a song I’m currently writing for an album I may someday produce.
And so for the rest of this month, I’ll keep repeating my mothers words aloud:
Home. Home. Home.
Practices I’m Carrying Forward-
Someone once said to me that if you truly listen, you must listen with a desire to be changed. I spent a week of January focusing on just this. It was a beautiful experiment, and one that I learnt much from. In exchange, it meant I didn’t share much about myself, unless I was asked. But I observed, witnessed, and understood much more about the people I was with. I often think of myself as a good listener, but working from this space I was able to tune in and care less about outcome and fall into so many more unexpected moments. I dare you to try it- for an hour, for a day, alone or in partnership. See what arises- what comes up.
Monthly Oil Blends-
My youngest, Elliette, travels with about 6 oils strapped to the outside of her carry on. It always makes me laugh. She plays with them, and uses them seldomly. I think to her, it’s much more fun to have them with her, then to understand the power of them. I’m slowly sharing more with her as I see her interest grow around their potency.
I swear by essential oils to promote healing and balance both internally and outwardly. They are plant medicines derived directly from nature. My girls use them daily in an infuser in their room and on their bodies at night before bed or on their chest or wrists before school. DoTerra is the highest quality oils I have ever discovered and works fairly with all of their farmers by creating sustainable programming, health services, and shares in stocks.
If your looking to try something with little ones, my current favorites are:
Brave: Build a positive affirmation and empower your child before rushing out the door. Apply to the chest or wrists. Full of wild orange, amyris wood, cinnamon, and coconut oil.
Steady: Relieve nervousness or anxiety by applying to the bottoms of the feet or neck before heading out the door. Calming and a little fruity too. Filled with balsam wood, magnolia, coriander, and coconut oil, and great grounding oil to bring alignment.
You can purchase this full collection from me here
Join me for some time this year to recharge, reset, and move both inwards and outwards. I create space for participants to both be apart of a community, and also hold space for individuals to have alone time. We need socialization, but we also need stillness in order to blossom.
 Room for a few more to join me and Karen Pride in February for our weekend retreat (3rd year!) this time right here on the Oregon Coast. Act fast or you’ll miss us!
Or hop on a plane and meet me in Italy with Julie Jeske for a week of goodness in September. This week is full of pleasure and presence from beginning to end with meals, vineyards, walks, adventures, lively discussions, cooking classes, and sunrise yoga.
In October join me on the east coast for a nourishing weekend with Atieno Bird. 
More details below about all of these, and on my web page too.
If you don’t know me personally, you can expect to laugh a lot, share stories from you life, create vision for the future, eat really, really well, and I probably will invite you on some early morning runs:) Come play, come discover with me, and meet yourself where you are at. We will learn and love together on this wild mess of life. Please reach out directly if you have questions about any of my retreat offerings, I personally respond to all inquiries.
Community Yoga Classes at the Portland Playhouse are back in the new year! Classes are $10 for a drop in, and free to artists currently working at the Playhouse.These classes support the Education programs at Portland Playhouse, so feel good and give back to our community at the same time.
No one will be turned away for lack of funds or experience, classes are open to all levels- yoga, music, meditation, rest, and essential oils. Bring your own mat, please. Mark your calendars and come play, move, and breathe together. Bring a friend and walk to coffee with us afterwards.
My hope is that these classes will build community, connection, and balance in our lives. Please help spread the word to your family and friends! Then go for coffee or brunch after class, or the farmers market just two blocks away.
Community Yoga on Saturday and Sunday mornings 9-10:30am
$10 suggested donation fee. No one turned away.
Sunday February 9
Saturday February 22
Sunday March 1
Sunday March 8
Saturday March 14
A Blessing for you-
May you find home wherever you go, and may home be a continual part of where, and how you show up in your life. May home be both in you and around you. May you continue to redefine how home looks and feels.
I hope our paths cross and that I get to encounter your sense of home in a city, or a field, or in a class sometime soon.
Grateful for your continued presence here,
Wild at Heart
Co-led with Karen Pride
February 14th-17, 2020
Arch Cape, OR

Join your Wild at Heart co-leaders Nikki and Karen for a creative weekend built to ignite the senses, stir up your passions, and encourage community. This is the 3rd year in a row we have created a weekend together. We enjoy creating community, sharing our passions, and beautifying our world with food, movement, conversation, and art making practices.

Only a few spaces left!
Book your spot!
Vibrant Living
Co-led with Julie Jeske
September 5th-12th, 2020
Lucca, Italy

A week in Lucca, Italy with Julie Jeske and Nikki with daily yoga, deep conversations, delicious food and day excursions.

Join us here!
Limited to 18 women*
Creator's Retreat: Embracing the Soul
With Atieno Bird
October 23-26, 2020

There are many times when life requires active   yang energy of us: "reflect, choose, be intentional, create, own the authorship of your life and make the changes you need!" This retreat will focus on those more receptive   yin tasks that are not really tasks: letting the soul be who it is, accept love and healing, feel what it feels, grieve its losses, and reveal a way when it is ready. Where can you let go of pressuring yourself and instead ...allow? I can't help but mention that the topic has already begun - selecting Chestertown took a lot of yin processing; the way emerged on its own timing.

Reserve your spot here!
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