The other day while on social media I noticed this post from a single woman that I follow who is a wonderful practicing Catholic, it read
“ I may never understand men. At least the ones I’m interested in “.
My heart dropped into my stomach. I thought, and replied,
” Accept them for the person they are, as they should do with you. “Set people free with love not judgement” – Fr. Larry Richards “.
It makes me think of this other young Catholic woman I know who broke up with her boyfriend after several years in this relationship. When I heard this news I said to myself,
” why didn’t they just find a little apartment, throw a mattress on the floor, and get married?” .. At least they would then be living in purity and not sin . I also noticed this guy she was dating rarely escorted her to church on Sunday’s, as she was usually in the pew alone.
The thing is, first, single people who I talk with say they want to move into a house with all the luxuries of their parent’s house, before they get married. Second, as Men, we can work to do a better job of seeing a woman for the person she is and filling her heart with our love and affection. This includes your mother, your sister, and your friendships.
Men, ask the women in your life (if I am right) and get back to me.
I’ve told my own children early on, though, not to consider dating unless they know that they’re going to marry. This is what I did with my wife. Because, in our culture if you’re dating someone it usually means you’re having sex with them. Dating should really be the engagement stage before marriage, otherwise why date? Instead, just be friends and go out in groups and enjoy Christian friendship, for the true basis for married life is to be best friends.
John Paul II hints in Theology of the Body something like
” the sexual embrace is the nucleus of the marriage Sacrament “. I’m sure you hve seen as I have, there is too much emphasis (in our culture) on sex outside of the marriage covenant, and this gets in the way of men and women truly seeing each other for the person they are, and distracts them from seeing who God made them to be and His will for their lives.
In 1 John 11 it says:
” Beloved, if God so loved us, we also must love one another. “. The problem is, single or married, we live a lifestyle that moves too fast, delivers too little, and demands too much. What drives our lives, schedules, our relationships … and our souls … is that we want bigger, better, faster, and more.
However, for real change to happen in our lives, we have to find a way to reduce the confusion, complexity, distractions, and burdens of our everyday lifestyle, so that we can enrich the truth, beauty, and purity of our most important relationships.
Do you tell yourself that you’re going to slow down, create more time with God, get in shape, and build deeper relationships with family and friends … and so rarely do it?
Christ tells us the answer to this is to love (Him) more.
Turn your heart towards God as you are. Now.
Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good. God doesn’t.
