Easter Hat?

Lena: "I yust bought myself a new hat.  I like to buy a hat for myself ven I'm down in da dumps."
Ole:  "Hmmmm...I vundered vere you found it."

Cruise Entertainment
Ole and Lena took a Caribbean cruise one winter.  One day as they sauntered around the ship, they poked their heads into a lounge where the passengers were being entertained by a ventriloquist act.  Much to Ole's annoyance, they were telling Norwegian jokes.
Ole strutted up toward the stage.  "Yust a golldarn minute dere!  You got a lotta nerve tellin' yokes on da Norvegians! I know all kinds of dem, and dey're hard-vorking, upstanding people! You got no call trying to make dem out to be stupid!"
The ventriloquist was apologetic.  "I'm sorry you feel that way sir. Certainly I didn't intend any disrespect.  I was just..."
Ole cut him off short.  "I vasn't talking to you.  I vas talking to dat little hahn-yocker sittin' on your lap!"

Taken from Red Stangland’s “Ole & Lena Jokes”